A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
‘Hurry,’ she said, ‘stand in the corner.’ She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. ‘Don’t move until I tell you,’ she said. ‘Pretend you’re a statue.’
‘What’s this?’ the husband inquired as he entered the room. ‘Oh, it’s a statue,’ she replied.
‘The Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too.’ No more was said, not even when they went to bed. Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer.
‘Here, have this’ he gives the sandwich and beer to the statue. Then he said to the statue: ‘I stood like that for two days at the Smiths house and nobody offered me anything!!
Related Posts
On My First Day At My New Job I Saw My Husband’s Photo On My Coworker’s Desk
The man in the photo was Michael Davis. My husband. The night before, he had stood in our kitchen with his arms around me, telling me he…
On My First Day At My New Job I Saw My Husband’s Photo On My Coworker’s Desk- Part 2
Part 2 Three years. The number quietly rearranged everything I thought I knew. The business trips. The delayed flights. The client dinners. The weekends away. All of…
On My First Day At My New Job I Saw My Husband’s Photo On My Coworker’s Desk
Part 3 At home, Michael was gentle and attentive. He asked about my job, refilled my wine glass, and remembered tiny details from my day. I began…
My Wife Left Our Twins Right After Birth – 18 Years Later, She Showed up at Their Graduation with a ‘Special Gift’, But What My Daughters Did Next Froze the Room
Part 1 My wife walked away three days after our twin daughters were born and never came back. Eighteen years later, she appeared at their graduation with…
My Wife Left Our Twins Right After Birth – 18 Years Later, She Showed up at Their Graduation with a ‘Special Gift’, But What My Daughters Did Next Froze the Room – part 2
Part 2 A note when Grace won a spelling bee. Another when Lily played violin at her concert. I did it because I never wanted to be…
My Wife Left Our Twins Right After Birth – 18 Years Later, She Showed up at Their Graduation with a ‘Special Gift’, But What My Daughters Did Next Froze the Room – Part 3
Part 3 I stopped watching the stage and watched my daughters instead. Five days later, I helped them move into their dorms. Their colleges were close enough…
