Girls’ Night Out Gone Wrong: A Cemetery Mishap

Killers of the Flower Moon (2023)

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Two wives went out for a long-overdue girls’ night. They laughed, danced, and enjoyed one too many cocktails before deciding to walk home. The streets were empty, the night was cool, and their spirits were high—until nature called.

Desperate and giggling like schoolgirls, they realized they couldn’t hold it any longer. “We have to find somewhere to go!” one slurred. Looking around, they spotted a cemetery nearby.

“It’s perfect! No one will see us!” the other whispered.

Without hesitation, they ran behind a tall gravestone, crouched down, and relieved themselves. When they were done, they realized their mistake—neither had anything to wipe with.

“I’ll just use my panties,” the first one said, shrugging. She slid them off, did what she had to do, and tossed them aside.

The second one, not wanting to part with her underwear, looked around for an alternative. Her eyes landed on a fresh wreath resting against a nearby grave. Without much thought, she grabbed it, used it, and placed it back where she found it.

Feeling lighter and laughing at their predicament, they stumbled home, thinking nothing more of it.

The Next Morning

The first woman’s husband called the second woman’s husband in a panic.

“No more girls’ night out! My wife came home with no panties!”

The second husband sighed. “You think that’s bad? Mine came home with a ribbon between her cheeks that said, ‘We’ll never forget you.’”

What Happened Next

The first husband shook his head. “I had a feeling they’d get into trouble, but this?”

The second husband groaned. “And now she’s walking funny. She told me she had a ‘rough night’ but didn’t explain. When she turned around, I saw the ribbon! How am I supposed to react to that?”

They sat in silence for a moment before the first husband chuckled. “At least your wife made it back with some dignity. Mine stumbled in, flopped onto the bed, and mumbled, ‘It’s okay, I made a donation to the spirits.’ I didn’t know what she meant until I found her panties in the front yard.”

The second husband groaned. “I don’t know what’s worse—her using a wreath from a fresh grave or the fact that it had two ribbons! I pulled the other one out, and it said, ‘Rest in Peace.’ I asked her if she knew what she did, and she just stared at me, then said, ‘Some poor soul had a worse night than me.’”

The first husband laughed. “Maybe we should just ban them from drinking.”

“Or at least from graveyards!”

Meanwhile, in the next room, the two wives were nursing their hangovers, scrolling through their phones, completely unaware of the scandal they had caused.

“That was a great night,” the first wife murmured.

The second one nodded, rubbing her head. “Yeah. Though, I think next time, we should remember to bring tissues.”

The other husband said, “You think that’s bad? Mine came back with a sympathy card that said, ‘We will never forget you.’”

Edward Wayde

Edward Wade is a talented writer known for his unique blend of humor and storytelling. With a passion for making people laugh, he specializes in creating captivating stories and witty jokes. As a contributor to various platforms, Edward has gained recognition for his ability to craft lighthearted, yet thought-provoking content that resonates with readers of all ages. His witty style and sharp sense of humor have earned him a loyal following, making him a go-to writer for those in search of a good laugh and engaging narratives. Whether it’s a hilarious short story or a clever joke, Edward’s writing never fails to entertain.